Living In Your Sweet Spot

~ Kandyce ~ 6 Comments

God has given each of you a gift from his great variety of spiritual gifts.  Use them well to serve one another.  Do you have the gift of speaking?  Then speak as though God himself were speaking through you.  Do you have the gift of helping others?  Do it with all the strength and energy that God supplies.  Then everything you do will bring glory to God…” (1 Peter 4: 10-11, NLT).

Whether it’s coaching little league baseball, designing a home, or curating a Michelangelo exhibit at the Louvre, there remains an undeniable peace and sense of fulfillment from performing a task so naturally and effortlessly, it feels as if it were designed expressly for you.  This place is called purpose, destiny…your divine design: living life in your sweet spot.

While certainly not the first of its kind, Rick Warren’s The Purpose Driven Life ignited a flame of wildfire-like proportions in the hearts of those endeavoring to experience life in that sweet spot.  For many of those burning hearts, over 30 million to be exact, Warren’s book was their Kingdom Come! Why then, almost 10 years after its debut, are so many of us still tossing and turning, restlessly searching for the answer to the book’s subtitle: WHAT ON EARTH AM I HERE FOR?

While simplistic in theory, rediscovering our innate talents and abilities often proves to be anything but.   After years of cultural conditioning, our natural free spirits become weighted under the tomb of societal norms and we slowly and unconsciously lose our sense of self.  It usually isn’t until we have a degree or two in tow, have worked years in a job that doesn’t suit us and become frustrated that we realize, “oh no!  I grabbed the wrong bag!  This isn’t my suitcase…these aren’t my clothes!  THIS ISN’T MY LIFE!”  By this time, many have major financial and familial obligations.  Although we’re living out of someone else’s suitcase, we conclude that there is too much at stake to make a move now, and thus, we settle.

In his book, Cure for the Common Life, Max Lucado suggests that the key to living in your sweet spot is finding work that “honors God, helps others, and thrills you”.  I tend to agree with that assessment and strongly believe that if your daily work demonstrates these three attributes, you have achieved the noblest vocation.  Acclaimed author and career authority Dan Miller often says, “It’s not a ‘risk’ if it fits you.”  If that is true then, why stop after the discovery of your passion?  Take the leap of faith required to live life extraordinarily.  Why settle for a generic “off the rack” life when God has promised a life “tailor made” for you alone?  Selah.

Are You Seeking Contentment or Excitement?

~ Kandyce ~ 2 Comments

This question was asked of me on February 6th of this year.  My reply?  Both. 

The New Year brought with it a renewed sense of hope; hope of answered prayers and the opportunity for a fresh start.  2011 was teeming with the curiosity and excitement of unearthing something new.  And until January 22nd, all was going according to plan.  I was gliding along on my magic carpet when SUDDENLY! the rug was pulled from beneath me.  With no parachute, I found myself plummeting fast, grasping for something…anything, to save me from the hard landing that inevitably awaited me below.  It was all happening so fast, so much so that oxygen seemed to escape me.  Desperately gasping for air, every breath seemed both a blessing and a curse.  

While the ride down was scary and exhausting, it was not to be compared to the moment I ultimately hit the ground.  It hurt like hell.  I cried a river of silent tears.  And as difficult as some days were, I knew that staying down was not an option.  Somewhere in my unconscious, I knew that something great awaited me.  I couldn’t erase what had happened.  I had to fully acknowledge it, mourn, then mentally and emotionally move beyond it.  In other words, I had to become content with the reality that my carpet ride had come to an end.  But I still remembered the excitement and thrill of my magic carpet ride, so I’m compelled to jump on again.  Traveling to foreign lands, falling in love, becoming a wealthy independent freelancer…yep, I want it all.  But that’s just my definition of excitement. 

 content1  [kənˈtɛnt]                                                                                                                           4. peace of mind; mental or emotional satisfaction 

ex·cite2 /[ik-sahyt]                                                                                                                         –verb (used with object), -cit·ed, -cit·ing.                                                                                 3. to cause; awaken: to excite interest or curiosity.                                                                      4. to stir to action; provoke or stir up  

The Apostle Paul states “…I have learned, in whatsoever state I am, therewith to be content. I know both how to be abased, and I know how to abound: every where and in all things I am instructed both to be full and to be hungry, both to abound and to suffer need.” 

Or take Edgar Allen Poe, “The ninety and nine are with dreams, content but the hope of the world made new, is the hundredth man who is grimly bent on making those dreams come true.” 

So I suppose my answer to the question is summed up in Poe’s quote.  I am that hundredth man he speaks of that is content with the reality, yet filled with the hope of the new possibilities that await me when I arise.  

What about you…are you seeking Contentment or Excitement? 

http://dictionary.reference.com/

Training vs. Trying

~ Kandyce ~ 3 Comments

Excellence is an art won by training and habituation. We do not act rightly because we have virtue or excellence, but we rather have those because we have acted rightly. We are what we repeatedly do. Excellence, then, is not an act but a habit.  Aristotle

On the mountains of truth you can never climb in vain: either you will reach a point higher up today, or you will be training your powers so that you will be able to climb higher tomorrow.  Friedrich Nietzsche

…and it is with this final quote that I begin to update you on my journey.  The road along my journey to freedom hasn’t gone exactly as planned.  But then again, not all roads are smoothly paved as we might prefer.  Some are dirt and gravel, clay and sand.  Others have pot holes, speed bumps and construction cones.  Some roads are well lit, while others are dark with no clear path in sight. 

I pledged 3 goals to attain by March 20, one each for Mind, Body and Spirit.  

Mind                                                                                                                                                                         While I am happy to report that my TV watching has lessened, it is still getting far too much play!  So, in an effort to make my goals S.M.A.R.T. (Specific, Measurable, Attainable, Realistic, Time bound), I decided I needed to specify how I plan to meet my goals and ensure that they were measurable at the end of my 22-week journey.  It is now 5:30 PM and I have yet to turn on the “one-eyed demon.”  Yay!  I do, however, plan to watch 1 hour of DWTS (that’s Dancing With The Starts, for you laymen).  

In regard to the book reading, I recently finished The Shack by William P. Young.  I’m not a huge fiction buff, but this book is amazing.  Amazing in its imagery and imagination.  Amazing in its power to captivate the senses and pursue the heart of its readers.  Amazing to get to know God in a more tangible way.  Bravo, William Young…bravo!

Body                                                                                                                                                         Oh boy, where do I begin…  3 pounds lost and only 2 days of exercise in the last two weeks!  I suppose that’s better than nothing, but not nearly where I want to be.  My initial reaction to this perceived failure was disappointment and embarrassment, but then I was quickly reminded of something I read in Scott Reall’s book, Journey to Freedom. 

In it, Reall discusses the concept of Training vs. Trying:                                                               “Training vs. trying is the key to success.  ‘…There is an immense difference between training to something and trying to do something.’ When we try to change and do not succeed, we tend to give up after a few attempts. But when we train to do something, we set our minds on learning. No matter how many times we fail, we see ourselves as being one step closer to succeeding.  Trying is the raw use of willpower, nothing more. Training is learning the life skills needed for long-term change.” 

An aspiring Olympian gymnast (my favorite Olympic sport!) doesn’t give up after falling off of the balance beam or missing her landing.  She gets up, digs her hands and heels in the sand and tries again…and again…and again.  She tries until her body is perfectly aligned on the beam she’s able to ‘stick’ her landing.  She is training to become a gold medalist, not trying.  She understands that trying will only take her as far as the road is paved.  But when she begins to train, however, she goes beyond the smooth pavement and ventures into the rocky terrain of dirt and rocks, sand and clay.  She expects to have a few bad days, she expects the road to be long and arduous, she expects that she might want to quit.  Of course she never does because in the end, she expects to win.  

Spirit                                                                                                                                                                        I look forward to my first meditation tonight.  I am standing on the heels of expectation as I wait to hear what God will say, where He will lead…  Don’t worry; I will record every minute of the journey.  And if He allows, I might even share a bit of it with you. 

In the end…                                                                                                                                      I am training to become the best that I can possibly be: mind, body, and spirit.  I expect to run into a few roadblocks every now and then.  But my resolve is too strong to quit.  Mark my words and feel free to quote me, “I will win.”

I am reminded of Kerri Strug at the 1996 Olympics.  Two American gymnasts all fell flat on their butts after their vault routine, which put them behind Russia and in jeopardy of the Gold medal.  Kerri Strug was the final gymnast to vault when the unthinkable happened – she fell on her landing (which was very uncharacteristic for her).  She arose from the mat limping, clearly hurt.  She had a choice to throw in the towel and concede defeat or push past her pain to attempt her second vault.  Kerri chose the latter.  She performed at almost perfect vault, after which she fell to the mat in pain.  Although she suffered a fractured ankle and several torn ligaments, the pain wasn’t fit to be compared to the promise. 

She had trained herself to become an Olympic Gold medalist, and in the end, that’s exactly what she received.  What about you?

We’re 3feet away from Gold1…keep digging!

Humbly,

Kandyce                                                                                                                                                  Chief Gold Digger

  

1 Lechter, S.L. & Reid, G.S. (2009).  Three Feet from Gold.  New York: Sterling Publishing Company, Inc.

A Life to Remember

~ Kandyce ~ 8 Comments

I wonder what it would have been like to see your smile every day, to wake up on a Saturday morning to find you sitting on the couch in pajama pants and a white t-shirt, staring out the window

I wonder what it would have felt like to run and jump into your lap, lay my head on your chest and listen to – feel the cadence of your heart beat

I wonder what new ideas or business ventures would have been swirling around in that magnificent head of yours as you sit and think

I wonder how you smelled, what type of cologne you liked.  I wish that I could take that old white t-shirt you wore on Saturday morning, put it in a glass box, and preserve the scent of you forever. 

That way, whenever I started to miss you, or needed your advice, or just wanted to be close, I could pull it out and find immediate comfort in knowing that you were right there with me.

I always wondered why my grandfather was so fond of you.  Why he always asked me about you.  Why he felt it important to remind me of your good heart, your honesty toward him, and your pleasing manners.  He must have seen something great (pure, trustworthy, admirable) in you because a man impressing him was no small feat.

My friend and her dad danced to Stevie Wonder’s You Are the Sunshine of My Life              I wonder what our song would have been                                                                                    Oh, I know!  I Loved Her First.  It’s a little bit country, which makes it sweet enough for the moment, but tough enough to let him know that you were there first

I wonder what characteristics we share.  Well, not really.                                                           I know I have your lips and nose.  I know I have your passion and imagination.  I know we both long for freedom, loathe being told what to, and desire to chart the course of our own lives. 

When I wonder what I can do to honor your life, the only thing I can think of is to fully live mine:

To harness all the passion and zeal you had to fulfill your dreams to ensure mine come to pass                                                                                                                                                     To never become bridled by the status-quo                                                                                    To be true to myself and the gifts that God has given me                                                             To dust myself off and try, try again if at first I don’t succeed                                                     To love and give out of the abundant treasure of my heart                                                           To learn everything I can about you and share it with my children, grandchildren, and many generations of great-grand’s                                                                                                    To bind the memory of you in my heart                                                                                          To know that you loved me and are always with me

Love,                                                                                                                                                      Kandyce

I’m Changing…

~ Kandyce ~ 7 Comments

Monday Morning Series – Welcome to the Good Life

 Everywhere we look, the leaves are morphing from green to magnificent shades of red, burgundy, orange and yellow. As the number of daylight hours continues to wane, so does the health of the leaves. Some of these leaves have already fallen to the ground – eventually, they will all fall. Those fallen leaves will soon decompose and restock the soil beneath with nutrients needed for growth in the Spring. 

Last week, as I spent time reflecting over my life in the mountains of North Carolina, I began to see my life in the beauty of those trees. You see, I turned 30 two weeks ago and indeed, the tapestry of my life is changing. This Autumn season, I too must shed some leaves…allowing some things, people, habits to “fall” away to prepare for growth in the Spring.

There are 22 weeks until the Spring season of growth and expansion, and I have dedicated to address all three parts of my being during this next season: Mind, Body, and Spirit. For each area of my life, I will commit to shed 1 unhealthy aspect and replace it with something healthy.

  1. Mind                                                                                                                                                           Shed – My Television                                                                                                                    Gain – An expanded view of myself and the world through reading
  2. Body                                                                                                                                           Shed – 50 pounds by March 20, 2011                                                                                          Gain – Skills in learning to care for my temple. 
  3. Spirit                                                                                                                                             Shed – Tradition                                                                                                                           Gain – New ways to approach my relationship with God

I will share specific details on how I plan to reach each goal later today.

As I share my journey with you over the next 22 weeks, I invite you to journey with me.  I would love it if each of you would join with me, but if I could just get 3 to5 dedicated people to join me, I would love to share your stories of transformation at the end of our 22 weeks.  Each Monday morning, I will report on my progress…and hopefully encourage you along the way.  Wow!  I’m really putting myself out there…wish me luck!  If you would like to join me, respond to this post or email me at Kandyce@diaryofagolddigger.com.

Stay tuned for a new series release each morning…I haven’t completely decided how I will format each day, but Thursdays will definitely be humorous “Musings on turning 30.”  And since we’re always Thanking God It’s Friday, Fridays will be “Grateful.”  

Thank you for taking this journey with me and I look forward to growing together.

Humbly, 

Kandyce                                                                                                                                               Chief Gold Digger